Je suis arrivee (yes, I know I'm missing the accent on the first "e")

Bonjour, tout le monde! Well, I'm in a bit of a rush and still a bit tired from the travels (as well as having to think and write in French!), so I'll leave you with a little story that my workgroup and I composed in class today. Our book gave us the following scenario and instructed us to write a story...

I remember it was the 15th of January, 1951. I was happy to recall the day before, when I met a beautiful girl...[picture of girl sitting on a tree trunk follows] [Ed. note: I know...WTF?]

Anyhoo, here's the story that my group and I wrote to practice our newly acquired skillz in the plus-que-parfait:

"That day, I was walking in the forest. I saw a lot of trees and lots of animals, but the most beautiful animal that I saw was this girl sitting on a tree trunk. She told me her name was The Queen of the Forest. I introduced myself, and we decided to spend the day together. I asked her to dance and then gave her a flower. She told me, 'No!' I then asked if she would like to go on a picnic with me. She said she had a rendez-vous with some animals. I began to insist that I accompany her. She answered: 'Ehhhhhhhhh....OK.'"

In the words of '80s hairband Whitesnake...

...here I go again on my own.

Ooh, I get to fly to Montreal, Canada, today before the overnight flight to Paris, so technically that's another country I get to visit. :) Yes, I realize I'm quite liberal about my list of countries visited (see right panel: if I'm in a country for more than 2 hours, I've "been" there. Hee...I'm such a cheater!). From Paris, I have to take a 4 hour train to Bordeaux. I have a horrible feeling that I will get lost on my way to the train and become a prime target (hello, Asian tourist!) for Parisian pickpockets.

What's worrying me more is my host family. I'm just hoping that I won't be a complete ass during my 3 weeks with them and that they will be nice. The family who I'll be staying with is an older couple - a civil servant and a housewife. The information sheet described my pamily as "very nice and caring," but I guess I'm still wary/slightly delusional from my Ghana trip. I'll keep my fingers crossed! According to my information sheet, they also like movies (SCORE!), opera (neat), antiques (ah, I love "Antiques Roadshow"!) and "flee markets" (cute!).

Here's to hoping that I learn a little something and to eating a lot of good food. So it'll be cold and I'll miss ya, but I'll drink a glass of wine in everyone's honor to keep warm!

Je vais aller à la France

I want to look like zees when I get back. Oui, I want to be a quadrilateral.

***Thanks to YFunk3 for correcting my shoddy use of French articles. See, this is why I'm going to study more French!!!***

Given that I hadn't really learned much in my junior high and high school attempts (could it have been my teacher's Joisey accent?), I've had this in-the-back-of-my-mind desire to go to France and study French for a while. So much so that I absentmindedly signed up for a French language school's email list a few years ago. Every year, for the past two years around holiday season, I get an email for an "offre speciale," taunting me with discounted French courses.

"D'oh!" I usually think, "I have to work!"

I got the same email this year, and I nearly had the same thought again.

"D'oh!" my conditioned/brainwashed mind began to think, "I have to...wait a minute! No, I don't!"

So I'm headed to Bordeaux on November 26th, and I will be back on December 20th - both in time for Christmas and a dentist's appointment (yay!). I don't think French wine country will be as appealing in cold weather, but the discount is nice!

Bai Ling vs Zhang Ziyi

Um, excuse me, Ms. Ling - I think you forgot your top. Oh, wait...that is your top!

It has come to my attention that a few recent comments have hinted at Bai Ling's repeated fashion faux pas (read: dish cloth skirts, nipples popping out of dresses) and, indeed, recent social faux pas.

Let us not concentrate on Bai Ling's fashion faults so much as revel in the fact that she serves as an appropriate foil to the couture prowess of the lovely Zhang Ziyi (or Ziyi Zhang, now that's she's gone all "Western" a la Bai).

Way to crush those stereotypes about Asian women, Ziyi! Oh, wait...you're not!

With her upcoming English-speaking debut in "Memoirs of a Geisha" (as a main character, anyway...let's close our eyes reeeaaal tight and try to forget "Rush Hour 2"), Ziyi is poised to reinforce all sorts of demure and exotic stereotypes about Asian women - not to mention the age-old myth that Chinese and Japanese really are the same. Yes, the three main actresses in the movie are Chinese (in ethnicity, if not nationality) - Ziyi, Michelle Yeoh, and Gong Li. Represent!

Lest I sound like a hater, I actually like Bai and Ziyi. So Bai dresses like a two bit ho and has worse wigs than a Vegas drag queen, but at least she's got personality (plus, her co-stars have been quite an eclectic lineup - from Richard Gere in "Red Corner" to Will Smith in "Wild Wild West" to - who could forget - Anthony Anderson in "My Baby's Daddy)! So Ziyi is setting off a new generational wave of yellow fever, but at least she's a good actress (bonus points for the couture savvy). No Anna May Wong oppression for either of these chicks!

I've fallen off track

If the world was perfect and all went according to plan, I would be en route to Shanghai, sleeping on Natalia's air mattress in Berkeley and eating at Chez Panisse along the way. Alas, it seems as if I've fallen a bit off track.

Towards the end of my stay in Accra, I found out that my teaching assignment in China had fallen through (ah, there seems to be a falling theme in this post...). So, it was either (a) try to forge a new months-long existence on two weeks notice, or (b) delay/cancel the trip. I decided on (b). Just as well, I suppose. Bird flu is the news in China, and mom's a bit freaked (last time I wanted to go to China, it was SARS...geez, maybe it's a sign). Plus, I guess I should go to the doctor for a proper checkup on my (now seemingly fully cured) sickbug from Ghana. And, oh yeah, I think I'm getting a cavity.

It'll be nice to be home for Thanksgiving. In the meantime, I'm also reading a lot, catching up on news and pop culture (OMG, Kenny Chesney and Renee Zellwegger broke up? Wait, I don't care...), enjoying time with my parents, and marvelling in the insanity that is suburban life!

But now I have a huge credit on United Airlines to use up before August 2006. I might still go to China, but I'm open to your suggestions - fire away! Last week, I was in luck to catch "Where in the World is Matt Lauer?" on The Today Show (yes, my life has sunken to that level!), so that was slightly helpful. Croatia, anyone?

Feast your eyes on these babies

You know what sucks? Dial-up connection, photos that won't cooperate, and cold weather. You know what rocks? Being HOME!

Yes, yes...I totally agree with the staying alive part.

"Ellies" at Mole National Park.

Me and some cute (non-sucky) kids in Larabanga.

A view of Cape Coast. Check out the fishermen and my lack of Photoshop color correction (sorry!).

The ol' canons at Cape Coast Castle.

Balls. Cannon, that is! (Yes, I posted this picture just so I could type this caption.)

The tunnel leading down to the male slave dungeon at Cape Coast Castle. Chilling stuff.

A bricked-up door in the women's slave dungeon. This where the British used to stand to pick the women they would rape. (::manhating tendencies rise::)

One of the canopy walk bridges at Kakum National Park...

...oh, look! It's a board, on a metal ladder, with some rope net underneath! So secure!!

Not nearly as elusive as Insomniac Rooster

The elusive mancat in its natural habitat.

One more that just wouldn't fit...

Looky! Me! Trying not to fall!

One last (long!) hurrah from Ghana

It appears that this will be my last blog entry from Ghana. My flight leaves tonight for Frankfurt, and I’ll be in the cool, quasi-wintery comforts of New Jersey before long. There was so much that I wanted to write about before leaving, but I think I’ll just condense a bit of what I have to say into one post, eh?

News & Pop Culture
I realize that I’m returning to Joisey with little/no idea of what’s going on in US news or pop culture. I mean, I know that the Bush administration is generally imploding (oooh, I can’t wait to read more), that Brittany Spears had her baby (thanks for the tip, Jackie!), and that Janet Jackson has an 18 year-old, previously-secret kid (WTF?), but little else. Ah, well, I’ve got a bit of time to catch up. In the meantime, I take small comfort in knowing that I’ve learned quite a bit about Ghanaian news and pop culture. And, in the world of entertainment, Ghana’s quite a small world. Through her work in video production and editing, Yinka has met and personally knows tons of Ghanaian actors/actresses, TV personalities, models, and musicians. So she can easily point out who’s a ho, who’s dumb/smart/lame/cool, and recount scandals in detail. Spiffy!

Also, watching copious amounts of Ghanaian TV has allowed me to remember various commercial jingles. It’s also worth noting (in the vein of “YuhChic’s gettin’ stupid, yo!”) that I’m now addicted to several telenovelas now, which are incredibly popular here. I like Cuando Seas Mia (“When Will You Be Mine”…I think?), La Revancha(“The Revenge”), “The Promise” (it’s Filipino! Go, Asians!), and – my personal fave – Todo Sobre Camila (“All About Camila”). Mind you, it’s not something I’m particularly proud of, but I’m quite sad that I won’t be able to watch them with Yinka anymore. Damn you, Ghanaian TV, for getting me addicted. DAMN YOU!

Did I also mention that I've become quite a fan of football (i.e., soccer)? Just in time for the 2006 World Cup in Germany this summer! Now if someone could just explain this offsides rule to me...

Race and Religion in Ghana
I’ve recounted some of my obruni adventures for you, but – truly – I find race and religion an interesting topic. Regarding race and religion, here’s a quick run-down:

- The biggest minority group in Ghana (or at least in Accra) are the Lebanese. This is surprising, since, as a British colony, I really expected there to be more South Asians (there are not many here at all). Generally speaking, the Lebanese are well-off, with a majority of the posh shops and restaurants in Osu, the ex-pat neighborhood of Accra, being owned by them. There are a lot of stereotypes about the group, of course, and most that I’ve heard have been negative. Apparently, they treat the locals crappily, so there is some resentment brewing. What’s slightly funny is that some of the “Lebanese” aren’t really even Lebanese – they are Syrian, light-skinned South Asians, or Eastern European. Hee.

- Actually, I have to take back what I said about not seeing too many Asians in Ghana. I thought about this, and that’s off. In fact, the Asians (Chinese, Japanese, Koreans) seem to be investing a lot in Ghana. On my way to Cape Coast, for example, I was on a bus with three engineers from Mainland China who were on their way to a project. The bus drove on a road which was being rebuilt with the technical assistance of and funded by the Japanese government (there were quite a few Japanese and Chinese working on the road, redefining the term “coolie” once again). Then, there’s Tema, which is a seaport town not far from Accra, filled with many “half-caste” (half-Asian) people from the sailors that pass through. Oh, and let’s not forget the cheap Chinese and Korean goods flooding the Ghanaian markets! Ah, globalization. In any case, I haven’t seen any real cases of overt racism against Asians here…oh, except for that one time that this guy made “ching chong” noises at me in the parking lot and I flipped him off (he wasn’t happy about that). Other than that, it’s a lot of “Are you Japanese? Are you Chinese?” going on, and random people saying “Konichiwa” (sic?) to me (and me saying “Wrong country” and walking away). Whatev.

- Nigerians = violent (Ghanaian stereotype) and make crappy movies (my opinion).

- Tribalism – still alive and well in Ghana! I don’t know a lot about it, but it certainly can affect the country in very negative ways. For example, while I was in the North, I heard that the local education minister was sending teachers back to his home village/tribe instead of to villages who actually needed teachers. So his home village (which has about 100 primary school students) was assigned 7 teachers, while a village like Larabanga (250 primary school students) had one teacher. Um, yeah.

- Religion. Ah, crazy religion in Ghana. Most people are freaky evangelical-type Christians (speaking in tongues and the like), and I sense (from some of their behavior) and they’re not really “Christian” so much as hypocrites. And you know how much I love those types! Luckily, I’ve also met some really nice Christians, so I don’t have an entirely bad impression of it…just a generally bad one. Hee. There is also significant Muslim population in Ghana as well, but, as Yinka often says, Ghanaian Muslims aren’t such strict Muslims (premarital sex = a-OK!). Happy belated Eid-Ul-Fitr (end of Ramadan!), by the way…

- Ah, one last word on religion: despite adherence to Christianity and Islam, a lot of people still believe in old fashioned ju ju (voodoo is derived from this), which has jinxes and curses and all that. So many Ghanaians are still very superstitious and fearful about curses. Yinka’s notebook got stolen at her French class, so she wrote in her new notebook “Property of Yinka. If you steal this notebook, may you and your children be cursed for eternity.” Cool!

YuhChic the Man Hater
Okay, an exaggeration perhaps, but Ghana has certainly exacerbated my man-hating tendencies.

First of all, the attitude towards women (and by women) is annoying to me. That is, Ghanaian society is really a machismo one, where men can sleep with whoever they want, whenever the want (fidelity…ha!), whereas women are supposed to be submissive and loyal. ::sigh:: There’s no such thing as spousal rape here, at least it’s not recognized by the law, and rape victims are often made to feel like rape is their fault. Double ::sigh::

But that’s the general stuff. From more personal experience, let me give you some advice if you’re a single female wanting to travel abroad by yourself: if someone asks you whether you have a boyfriend or are married, answer in the affirmative, despite any man-hating tendencies you may have. :) When given the opportunity, say that you are married! It’ll save you trouble! It was hard to do this with a straight face, but I managed to become a pro at the end.

When people (Ghanaian males, to be specific) first asked me, I was a chump and answered that I didn’t have a boyfriend. Then they’d ask me why and insisted that women cannot be without companionship. This all leads to the inevitable conclusion of the conversation: I want to marry a white woman and have her take me away from here. I chatted with several taxi drivers (after telling them I was married…hee), they actually asked straight out: “Give me the numbers of your white lady friends and I will call them and maybe they will marry me.” One of the drivers was like, “Oh, you are American? Then you are beautiful!” Hehe, nice pickup line, buddy.

On some level, the whole situation is sort of funny, but also really sad to me. Besides the whole line of thinking that many Ghanaian men (and women) think that an obruni is a fast way to get out of the country (my taxi driver’s thinking: “Well, if you are a white woman in Ghana, then you must come here because you like black men and want to marry one?”), it’s a bit tragic that few people want to stay and make things better. Triple ::sigh::.

In any case, with rare exceptions, my experiences with Ghanaian dudes have been largely negative – what with being a foreigner and a woman, as well as all the negative experiences that others have recounted to me. I’m more of a man hater than ever, really. Hmm, positive or negative outcome of this trip? I just don’t know.

Bribin’ it up
I’ve tried to write about mostly good/funny experiences during my time in Ghana, but I’ve hinted at some disillusioning experiences as well. I got one last present – an important whack of reality – from Ghana just before I left.

On our way back home from purchasing some souvenirs for my family in her car, Yinka and I were trying to pull into a main road from a dirt side-road. No lanes marked, no signs forbidding joining the traffic. Yinka followed another car into the main traffic. Suddenly, a traffic cop (or Ghanaian equivalent) pulled us over. Apparently, we were taking a “unauthority (sic) road.” The cop let himself into the car and told us to pull into the nearby police station.

Once at the station, he and another officer took Yinka’s license and keys, informing her that she would have to pay a $500,000 cedis fee (US$50+, but a lot), or her car would be impounded and she’d have to go to court and pay $2.5 million cedis. Verbal abuse followed, since we questioned why we were pulled over in the first place. The cops were getting pissed, we were kind of upset, and it just generally sucked.

For those who don’t recognize the situation, the cops were looking for a bribe. ::sigh::

As I was talking to the coppers and trying to calm them down, I was really trying not to say the following, but eventually, I had to: “Sir, how much do I have to pay for us to fix this problem?”

I’m not really proud of my behavior. In fact, I daresay that I might go to hell for being part of the problem. But, as I was watching Yinka get upset at the prospect of losing her car for 2 weeks, I guess I just realized that sometimes money (and, er, principle?) is a small price to pay for your friends and family. I paid the dudes $300,000 cedis (Cop, as I was trying to slyly hand over the money: “Hide that!”) and we ripped outta there. Ah, what an experience.

Corruption is rampant in a lot of the third world, I guess, and – if you’ve never experienced it – it’s easy to say “Well, people just shouldn’t take part of it! It’s morally wrong and hurting development!” In reality, it’s much different. In fact, it’s really scary how easy it is to give a bribe, and thus contribute to the vicious cycle of corruption. The only thing I could really do to make myself feel better was to convince myself that those cops were going to cursed or punished by God – you know, much in the same way in high school when I convinced myself that the “cool” kids would eventually be punished for their crappy behavior towards nerds in high school. My high school wishes came true, so I can only hope that my current conviction does, too.

Last thought…really!
Finally, eight weeks of living in Ghana has certainly been interesting! I’ve seen quite a range of living standards, that’s for sure – from posh (and not-so-posh) urban surrounds to a much simpler village life. There were new friends as well as not-so-nice people; there were great traveling stories, and there were disillusioning life experiences, too. To avoid being overly corny about the whole thing (tough for me, I know!), my time in Ghana really allowed me to learn a lot about the world and (dare I say it?!?) myself. Despite any disappointments, I would do it all over again. Well, maybe sans mysterious illness, but I would!!

In any case, I made some great friends for life during my time here and got a smack of reality in a lot of stuff. For these, I will remain very grateful!


Sidenote of the Day: Did I mention thank you?
I wanted to thank my friends and all the peeps who actually read this blog! I hope you sort of enjoyed it. Let me know if you have any suggestions – I’ll endeavor to keep it up for the rest of the year. Also, thanks to those who sent their good wishes while I was ill – I appreciate it and apologize for not sending thanks sooner!

See you soon (if only in cyberspace!)!

Kids say (and do) the darndest things

A group of primary school kids in Cape Coast who followed me down the street, chanting “Obruni! Obruni! Obruni!” I snapped this as I was running away.

As previously blogged (e.g., serial hugger, “psssst”ing kids asking for money, etc.), some of my experiences with Ghanaian kids have been slightly sucky. However, a few incidents do make me smile, and I thought I’d share them with you here.

Good manners
This happened recently as I was walking on the streets of Asylum Down, with Yinka providing quick translation.

Kid: White woman! White woman! [Ed. Note: Yeah, that’s me…remember, "not black"="white"]
Kid’s Mother: (in Twi) It is not polite to say that. If you want to greet someone, you say “hello.”
Kid: White woman…hello!

Tee hee, you can’t say that the kid doesn’t listen to his mom.

Mad English Skillz
An example of why street kids who want to chat up/hustle obruni should really go to school and improve their English.

Street Kid: How are you?
Me: Fine. How are you?
SK: HOW ARE YOU?
Me: Um, fine. How are YOU?
SK: (pause) HOW ARE YOU?!?

Well, at least “Give me ____!” isn’t the one phrase she knew.

That Sweet Obruni Touch
A lot of the kids I have met really find it exciting to touch and to be touched by obruni. This means that they will run up to you and grab your hand, stroke your arm, touch your hair, etc. I understand this fascination to some extent, but, as I was being swarmed by a group of primary school kids in a Cape Coast schoolyard, I got the weirdest request yet:

School Kid: White lady, slap me!
Me: Excuse me?
SK: Slap me! Please!
Me: Slap you? Uh, no thanks, kid.

Although (and I will really burn in holy heck for this) it is quite tempting to slap a lot of people, both in Ghana and elsewhere in the world!

The Cutest Litterbug in Ghana
On my way to Larabanga, my 12-inches-per-ass tro-tro made a quick stop in a village, whereupon several people disembarked and a few more got on the bus. A cute little kid, maybe about 6-7 years old, sat down in the empty seat next to me (due to the fact that his ass was significantly smaller than the allotted 12 inches, this was quite a nice change of seating partner). During the stop, I had purchased a sachet of pure water and finished sucking it dry. I’m not really fond of Ghanaian-style trash disposal (i.e., throw it out the bus window), so I folded up the empty plastic sachet and held it in my hand until I could find a trash bin somewhere.

As the bus starts to move, the little kid next to me didn’t really say anything or stare at me (I’m accustomed to kids staring quite a lot, so this seemed weird). Instead, he just munched on his snack and stared ahead. Suddenly, he looked down at my hand and saw that I was still holding my empty plastic water sachet. He looked up at me, smiled, grabbed the sachet out of my hand, threw it out the bus window for me, and smiled at me again before staring ahead – all without saying a word. Despite the fact that I had just, indirectly, littered, it was so disarmingly adorable that all I could manage to say was, “Thanks!” to the little litterbug. He just smiled back and continued munching on his snack.

For the remaining hour or so that I was on the tro-tro, I saw the little kid take glimpses at my (considerably paler) arm, examine his own arm carefully, get a little flustered look on his face, then repeat the whole process again, as if to marvel at the color difference. The whole time he didn’t say a word. Seriously, it was so cute it broke my cute meter. Smashed it to pieces, actually.

Kids say and do the darndest things. Really.

"I survived the walkway"

Happy November, everybuddy.

I'm in Cape Coast, which is just about 3 hours away from Accra and a quaint town that used to be the seat of British colonial rule back in the day. After my vacation got hijacked by illness, I decided that I still wanted to see some stuff, so I came here. It's been great! I went to Cape Coast Castle, which is probably the most famous slave castle in Ghana (and Africa?). It was scary...

Also scary, in a more immediate way, was the rainforest canopy walk at Kakum National Park, one of four in the whole wide world. I walked across 7 rickety rope/wood/metal bridges that were about 12 inches wide, 40 meters above the rainforest ground. DOPE. Despite some vertigo (seriously) and fears of dying (naturally...but I'm old hat now), "I survived the walkway," in the words of the cheesy T-shirt that I didn't buy from the gift shop.

The hotel I stayed at was loverly, too - owned by a really cute Ghanaian-American couple who recently moved back after 35 years in (of all places) Oklahoma. I also added another great culinary experience to my Ghanaian trip: fresh grilled snapper (Cape Coast is a big fishing town). YUM.

I'm going to try to post some pictures (and videos!) when I get back to Accra. In the meantime, it's a mad dash to blog as much as possible before I leave Ghana on Sunday. Somehow, blogging from NJ doesn't seem quite so exotic!

Taste of Ghana

For me, half the fun of traveling is eating my way through a country. Sure enough, some of you think so, too. I’ve received a request to write about culinary delights of Ghana, so, people pleaser (and lazy list maker) that I am, I will try to describe a bit of Ghanaian chop that I’ve experienced so far. By the way, typical Ghanaian fare like much of the stuff I’ll describe below is called “chop”…they’re sold in “chop shops”. Cute, eh? This is admittedly boring for a lot of you who just don’t care, but…eh!

Oh, yeah, it goes without saying that most traditional Ghanaian foods are eaten with your hands. Specifically, your right hand (left hand=dirty, dirty, DIRTY!). Whenever you go to a chop shop, you’ll see a bottle of liquid soap on the table. The first time you see it, you'll be like, “Whaaaa…?” Sometimes, it's dishwashing soap, so you'll be doubly confused ("Uh, should I wash my bowl before I eat?"). But the soap is for washing your hands. Right before your food comes, the waiter brings you a bowl of water, plus another little bowl. You pour a bit of water in the little bowl (to reserve some clean “rinsing” water), and use the rest of the water and the soap to clean your hands before eating. Cute, eh?

1) Omo tuo and groundnut soup
Omo tuo are rice balls. Those of you who know my Chinese nickname of “Rice Tub” have probably guessed right – I like omo tuo! Actually, the rice is mushed up and tastes a bit like baby food, but that saves me the job of chewing, I guess. The balls (hee) are submerged in a soup/stew. I like groundnut (i.e., peanut) soup/stew, probably my favorite Ghanaian food discovery and which I actually learned how to make! Dude, groundnut soup is tasty. I apologize to anyone who is disgusted by this (sorry, Natalia!). The dish is also usually served with meat (I’ve had it with bush meat – antelope, yum!) or fish (Ghanaians really like tilapia. There are little cartoons of smiling tilapia fish on every fish shop sign).

Omo tuo is traditionally served only on Sundays. Some restaurants have it only on Sundays, but others have it all the time. I wish they would make up their minds. In any case, the restaurants who sell it everyday are probably in the money – ya know, supply and demand. Still, given the tradition of “Sunday=omo tuo,” I feel a bit weird eating it any other time of the week.

2) Fufu
Ah, this must be the national dish of so many West African countries. It’s made of different stuff in different countries, but in southern Ghana, it’s made of cassava (aka manioc, a root veggie) and yam (in the North, they use all yam). So what is it? Basically, it’s a sticky ball of goo that results when you pound cassava and yam together. Imagine you overmash potatoes, and it releases all the crazy cellulose from the cell walls, bypassing the much beloved mashed potato stage and, instead, becoming sticky mass of starchiness. Submerge ball of stickiness in spicy soup/stew (by the way, the Ghanaians love using hot red pepper in all their soups…yikes) and chow down. Mmmm, appetizing, eh? I’m not a big fan, but it’s a really “manly” food here. It most definitely sticks to your ribs. In any case, it’s cool to see ladies pounding fufu. The women here usually use a big mortar and pestle (as big as them!) and really pound the shit out of those yams and cassava. Sometimes there’ll be a group of several ladies standing around a large mortar, pounding together. It’s kinda scary when you think about the strength they have to do that. They could seriously kill a man with that type of strength.

3) Banku
I like banku, but I appreciate the fact that others will think it’s nasty. It’s just a ball of sticky dough – I think it’s fermented corn or something, so it’s sour. Ever have Ethiopian food and the sour bread that comes with it? It kind of tastes like that. Unlike fufu or omo tuo, the banku comes on a plate, and you get a plate of stew with meat/fish in a separate bowl. To eat the banku, you take a little ball of it in your hand, dip it in stew, and begin stuffing your face. Tasty! Just as with fufu, as it enters your digestive system, you imagine it sticking to the insides of your intestines and understand why colonic treatments are so popular for clearing one’s internal plumbing. So I like it, but I think, for the sake of my health, I shouldn’t eat too much of it.

4) Tuo zaafi (TZ) and okra stew
That’s “TZ” as in “T-Zed”. Crazy non-Americans and their “zeds”. Anyhoo, here’s another beloved Ghanaian starch fest, although it’s really a Northern dish and not many people in the South know what it is. TZ is a porridge-like, spongy mass of starch that’s made of corn and manioc flour (I think). It tastes a whole lot like…nothing. Okay, it sort of tastes like…er, paste? Okay, bad comparison. The point behind the sticky/slimy/seedy okra stew that it’s usually served with is so that the TZ can slide down easily. You’re not supposed to chew it – just swallow. Apparently, you’re also not supposed to chew fufu or omo tuo either (ahh, that explains the baby food texture…!). Anyhoo, I realize that my description of TZ as slimy paste is not particularly appetizing, but it’s not bad – I’m kind of indifferent to it. Maybe that’s because I was in Larabanga (and starving and feeling bad about my hosts starving from Ramadan fasting) when I had it.

5) Fried Rice (and an inexplicable amount of Chinese food)
Fried rice is everywhere! It’s a staple with the broiled and fried chicken here…and it’s often fast/street food, which they call “check check” (cute, eh?). Check check is usually ridiculously cheap and comes served to you as take-out in a plastic bag. Yummy – plastic! In any case, Ghanaian fried rice tastes a whole heckuvalot like Chinese fried rice, except here it’s usually served with shitto (pause for incredulous giggle/snicker), which is a spicy black pepper oil with ground fish in it. It sort of tastes like Chinese sha cha sauce, for those who know what that tastes like.

For some odd reason, there are a lot of Chinese restaurants here. I chalk it up to the fact that Ghanaians really enjoy their MSG fix as well. I haven’t seen a lot of Chinese people, per se, but it just goes to show you that my peeps are everywhere!!! I actually went to a Chinese restaurant in Accra. It was…er, well, I don’t expect a lot out of Chinese food outside of China. It was okay…kind of like bad Americanese food. In any case, the Chinese owners and I made a connection. Their eyes just lit up with happiness when they saw me. It was nice. :)

Apparently, there are a lot of really high-class, pricey Chinese restaurants in Accra. Maybe something to check out before I leave.

6) Fried yam and fried fish
Oh, man, this is a tasty combo! Again, it’s a check check meal, so you’ll usually buy it from a street stall and carry it away in a delightful little plastic bag, all while trying not to think about the chemicals that the plastic bag might be releasing into your food. You eat the fried yam with shitto (pause again for snicker), and the fish is usually “red fish”, which is snapper or something like that. You have to be careful who you buy it from though, since the street vendor may not always change the frying oil, and the yam and fish often taste like petroleum when they’re fried in old oil. Nasty! Still, once you find a vendor who changes the frying oil regularly, it’s like a little bit of heaven for only 10,000 cedis. Unfortunately, given the recent cholera scares in Accra lately, I’ve given up street food for the time being. But fried yam and fish are so delightfully tasty (and unhealthy) that I might be able to overlook disease for it…

(A funny note on shitto: it takes some getting used to, but it’s really good! Yinka mentioned that her Western friends used to call it, “Shit, oh?” Heheh, just so you get a sense of what too much of it can do to you…)

7) Jollof rice
Yinka taught me how to make this, and most of you might actually not be grossed out by it! Jollof is basically like a West African paella, rice cooked in tomato-based sauce with veggies and meat. It’s benign, it’s tasty, it’s not a ball of sticky starch. I’ll make it for you next time I see you.

8) Red red and fried plantains
Ah, red red. Yet another example of a cute name for a tasty food. Red red is bean stew, made of black-eyed peas (so it looks like), some stew-y flavorings, and lots of palm oil. The thick and strangely orange palm oil has got to be bad for you, but it’s also what makes the red red tasty (go figure). It’s served with a big pile of fried plantains and either fried chicken or fried fish.

9) Fresh fruit
Sweet tropical weather and the delightful fruits that you bring forth! The selection on the street is actually kind of limited, but it’s stuff that you can’t get everyday in the USA. The most popular fruits that I’ve really enjoyed have been papaya (called “por por” here), pineapple, and oranges. You can buy them all on the street, and the vendors often cut them up for you. You can often get fresh fruit juices here, too (Kenny, don’t get overexcited!) – fresh pineapple juice rocks my world.

The oranges are of special note here: the vendors cut them in a way that you can suck out the juice without getting your fingers sticky. Neat. The oranges are also not orange – they’re green, but still ripe and sweet. I realize that this messes up kids here, because their reading primers show a picture of an orange-colored orange and the word “orange” beneath it, but they’ve probably never seen an orange orange in their whole life. Weird.

10) Chocolate
Ghanaians take special pride that they’re one of the biggest cocoa producers in the world. They have documentaries on cocoa harvesting on TV, for gosh sakes. Anyways, this, combined with Yinka’s fondness for chocolate, has given me a greater appreciation for this fine food. The European chocolates here are actually a bit pricey, but the local chocolate is tasty and cheap. I’m very fond of the coffee chocolate – I’m planning on buying a bunch of it to hoard home.

11) Tampico
Dude, this is seriously just Sunny Delight under a different name. I even read the back of the bottle, and it’s licensed to a company in Chicago. But I don’t even like Sunny D in the states…I’ve been fooled by the African marketing! Nooooooo!!!

12) FanYogo
This is just frozen yogurt in a pouch. No, like real yogurt (the sour kind – maybe with some fruit flavor) sealed in a pouch and frozen. I’ve noticed they like sucking stuff out of pouches here. Hmmm. Anyways, the FanYogo is a nice treat and is usually sold on the streets. No, like on the streets where cars are whizzing past, and dudes weave in and out of traffic, carrying the pouches in coolers on their heads or on the front of their bikes. At a stoplight, when you’re hot and sweaty in the comfort of your car, you buy a FanYogo from one of these guys, who’ll hand it to you with a small sheet of torn newspaper, so your hand doesn’t get cold while you suck the yogurt out of the pouch. How considerate!

13) Obruni food
All right, so there comes a point in every foreign country when I get a little homesick for the familiar comfort of Western food. I’ve indulged myself a few times in Ghana already, and, yes, obruni fare is a bit pricey. There are a lot of nifty restaurants (but no McDonalds!) in Accra. In addition to the typical burger ‘n’ fries and pizza, I’ve also had some incredible pastry at a francophone African bakery (to the French: you were shitty colonizers, but thank you for bringing the delights of the boulangerie and patisserie to your West African colonies!). Today, I went to a fancy coffee shop and had a chicken salad sandwich, a salad, a cup of Twinings tea, and a slice of peach pie. When I finished, I laid my head down on the table and wept with joy. Okay, that’s a lie, but it made me very happy. As much as I’ve enjoyed Ghanaian food, I’m excited about returning to the world of sandwiches and salad (and Mom and Dad’s cooking!).